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4 Ways to Surround Yourself with Positive People

Your surrounding is very important for your growth.

In this article, you'll learn proven and practical ways to analyze and tune your surroundings such that it propels and inspires you for success (and not drain you).

You may have heard this phrase, ‘Who you hang out with is who you become.’

There is a reason why researchers have proven this phrase to be true, over and over again.

Let me explain this with an example - 80% of the jobs are found through referrals and 68% of the spouses are found through mutual social circles. There are many other areas in your life which are largely influenced, if not determined, by your surroundings.

In fact, your social circle heavily influences whether:

    1. You engage yourself in sports activities
    2. You get overweight
    3. You donate to charity
    4. You participate in a crime
    5. You develop healthy habits
    6. You drink and smoke it habitually.

Thus, it becomes very important to understand how to surround yourself with optimistic people who will support you.

“Surround yourself with those who only lift you higher.”  — Oprah Winfrey

This saying is a great piece of advice undoubtedly.

But how can we try this in the real world?

Unfortunately, the reality is that your surrounding constantly holds you back rather than support you. This fact can be demonstrated by a well-known phenomenon known as the Crab Bucket Theory.

According to Wikipedia, the best phrase to describe this way of thinking is, ‘If I can't have it, neither can you.’ This theory explains the way of thinking using an experiment with crabs. If crabs are put in a bucket, then each crab can easily escape. But it doesn’t happen because other crabs hold it down and make sure that this one cannot escape.

Similarly, this kind of behaviour is very frequent when it comes to people. More often than not, they do not want you to achieve big success, because it will make them feel inferior to you. Thus, you need to put special efforts to surround yourself with people who assure and support your success – those that will help you move forward in life.

Here are the five practical ways of how we can create a positive surrounding:

1. Read and watch inspirational and educational content

Nowadays, we have access to a vast range of articles, books, and videos. It has become very accessible to connect with the best minds of all times, easily.

Suppose you want to work out, you can engage Arnold Schwarzenegger, former bodybuilding champion, as a personal fitness coach.

If you want to start a business, you can ask for advice from Bill Gates.

If you want to invest money, you can connect to one of the world's best investors Warren Buffett, to get useful tips.

If you wish to learn compassion and love then Mother Teresa will share her best advice with you.

It feels like a dream come true when you can actually connect with these people indirectly through their books and videos.

This interesting story will elaborate on this method –

Dale Carnegie, author of one of the best-selling books of all time “How to Win Friends and Influence People” also wrote a book called, “Lincoln the Unknown”.

At one point in his life, he got very engrossed in Abraham Lincoln. He studied everything, that he could, about him. By studying so much about Lincoln, he imbibed the characteristics. That is how he managed to develop the great principles of effective relationships with other people.

So, where did Lincoln get his skills from?

Well. Lincoln studied the first US president - George Washington. In fact, he had a portrait of Washington on the wall of his cabinet. So, any time Lincoln was doubtful about how to act in a certain situation, he looked up at that portrait and asked himself how would Washington act in his place.

This story tells you how powerful it is to learn from other successful people via books and videos.

2.Take part in ______ tournament

I met my wife at a chess tournament and even though she was not a professional player she still attended the event. Since then, we have been married for 11 years and are raising our daughter happily.

My wife Alyona

There are various kinds of sporting events that you can easily find in your city – (perhaps, a marathon or mini-marathon). There are many sports events organized for nonprofessional athletes or amateurs who want to connect with like-minded people to do useful activities together and have fun along the way.

So, it is okay if you don't have any special sporting talents - you can still take part in these events. It will greatly help you to connect with other people who strive for self-improvement for living a healthy life. You will also come across people who are energetic and aim to achieve certain goals in life. Eventually, it will help you to surround yourself with the winners.

3. Participate in seminars and workshops

Taking part in seminars of personal development helps you to connect with people who aspire for constant self-improvement.

Hence, you will have a positive upbeat environment surrounding you. Likewise, such people are contagious. So eventually, you will be inspired to achieve more in life. In the course of time, maybe you will also make some good friends.

4. Join MLM companies

A lot of people are sceptical about MLM (Multi-Level Marketing) companies. Some of them, indeed, may distribute a suspicious product. However, you can find something that is aligned with your values. If you are able to do so, you can benefit massively from the events organized by these companies.

I remember once I had attended the event organized by an Austrian Company. They were selling health insurance. There is a common stereotype that a successful entrepreneur is a college dropout. However, that event was mainly attended by females aged between 50 – 60 years. Yet, the energy was so vibrant.

The team spirit found in MLM companies can rarely be found at a traditional job. In MLM companies, you can learn a lot and also feel supported. You have an opportunity to connect with a lot of optimistic people who are actually interested in supporting you.

5. Apply for business grants and join business incubators

Now you might be thinking, what if I'm not a business owner?

Well, these programs are created specifically for helping you to become one.

Let's say you are an IT specialist, you can create an IT agency.

If you are a make-up artist, you can open the makeup studio.

Thus, this transition is relatively easy if you know what to do and if you have the necessary support.

Such programs are actually designed to help you. When you apply for business incubators, generally, you are provided with a loan,  seed capital for your business and maybe even an office space for free. Most importantly, it gives you an opportunity to connect with mentors who will be keen to share their wisdom. Along the way, you will be able to learn a lot and elevate your personal growth.

Undoubtedly, such events are filled with highly energetic people determined to make affirmative changes in their life. Hence attending such events and hanging out with these people can allow you to grow your business and also make some new friends.

So now, just have a look around you. How do you feel about your surrounding?

Let me know in the comment section below.

Igor Smirnov

Igor Smirnov

Psychologist, blogger, chess Grandmaster, Internet entrepreneur. Follow Igor on Facebook

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